ADD: Marc, I'm sorry for calling you out. I don't know why I lashed at you like that. Maybe I just needed someone to blame. I know in truth, the only person to blame is myself. I'm still in that whole "this is all bullshit" phase, but I'll get over it and move on soon. Reading what I wrote yesterday, I feel like low-bred scum. I don't know how I allowed myself to get so low. Here is my public apology to you. I'm so very sorry.
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I can't take it all out on someone that "might" have tattled on me. For all I know, it could be my own fault. Still, I really don't think I deserved to lose my job for getting some tea while I was sick, then later, when I felt a little better, going to pick up my sister's boyfriend from work because she was asleep---nursing herself after catching whatever I had. Apparently, the management sees it another way.
I can't stay mad forever. Either I sit here and bitch about it all day long or I dry those almost-tears forming in the corner of my eye and start filling out applications. Do I have a choice? So many people expect me to be strong and carry on. Some people even laughed and said "No way". My mother didn't even believe me when I told her. It took my sister's firm confirmation in order to gather her acceptance.
I really wonder, even though I have no way of knowing, if anyone will miss me. I know exactly who won't, but I hope the ones I liked will. I know I'll miss them.
Anywho... tomorrow I'll be heading over to the unemployment office and filling out paperwork most of the day. Then around 4:30, I have a date with Ms. Danielle, who finally agreed to hanging out with me. Part of me thinks it shouldn't be so hard to get a date with someone you might be destined to be with, the other part thinks it definitely shouldn't be easy.
Also, something that's much harder than finding a new job, harder than leaving the best job I ever had behind, and harder than telling everyone I know all at once that I lost it.....
Telling my dad.
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2 comments:
"I can't take it all out on someone that "might" have tattled on me."
Well guess what Wes, you did. Contrary to your own failure to understand what YOU did to get yourself fired, I had nothing to do with this and you've now called out someone who had no dislike for you. Check your voicemail, I've already left you one message. You'd best man up and speak to me in the real world instead copping out like this. You've got it all wrong dude.
We're cool. I'm glad we spoke. I hope it all comes together for you and you keep moving forward Wes.
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