Big changes indeed. Jeez, what a year 2007 was. I seemed to have turned my foot into swiss cheese after shooting it so many times. What do they say? The World Is My Oyster? I'm not too sure if that's accurate, because I can't seem to get the damn shells to open.
I'm not huge on being sentimental, but I enjoy the occasional trip down memory lane. Here are some of the biggest memories I have of 2007.
1. In February, I got a job at the newspaper-- a real one-- and kept it for just over 9 months. Even though the ending was a fucking fiasco, there are only two things I'll miss about that job. The friends I made, and the money. Yes, in that order.
2. March 2007 was the first year I ever contemplated suicide. I had been so royally screwed over by my ex and made a fool of that I really just wanted to end my life. It was shameful, embarrassing, maddening, all of the above. But soon after, I got over it. The weak bonds I had with friends either became very strong or were shattered. I suppose that's how it goes.
3. Over the course of 2007, I moved (and I'm about to move again) four times. I went from living alone, to living with a coworker, to living with my sister-- which has created a bond between us that I don't think existed before other than being simply related.
4. I got really really out of shape in 2007. All the drinking, late night meals, and sleeping late created an environment that allowed my body to shape-shift from the lean, fit guy I started out as, into a husky guy with a bit of a beer belly. Not that I'm overly concerned about my looks. I still look damn sexy. Just kidding. Anyway, I definitely see that changing in the first parts of 2008.
5. I realized (toward the end) that I wanted to finish school. How I'm going to get back in, and by what means I'll use to pay for it is to be determined, but I'll figure it out.
Anyway, enough sentimentality. Sis and I found a cool house to live in and we plan to rock it out, old-school. I've got to get over the whole not having dates over at my place thing. I haven't had a girl come to my place since 2006. Yikes. Mainly, it's because I always felt weird about having girls over when I live with my sister. Other girls get a vibe that tends to igg them out a little when they know the dude's sister is in the other room. Especially if there's shagging goin on. Yea baby! Anyway, when we move into the house, I'm going to be PROUD of living there-- not avoiding it like a cell phone bill. I also want to get my car fixed, and be proud of it too. God knows I walk enough.
So that should be all for now. Next time, I'll set you guys up with a nice little report on how to have fun at a bar, el-cheapo-style.
I'll also tell you what's going on with DC and JR. In a nutshell, JR and I decided to just be friends, while DC and I spent some time together last night. That was really fun-- except tonight her roommates came back, and they're her "posse". She's a totally different animal around those two.
Showing posts with label JR. Show all posts
Showing posts with label JR. Show all posts
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Doo bee dooo!
I'm kinda shitfaced right now, but luckily I wrote this blog about 6 hours ago just in case this would happen. Here it goes:kl
The job hunt continues, but I have several leads. It's really just a matter of getting off my fat ass and making things happen. Ideally, I would work for the place Alex was talking about temporarily, cleaning offices. I like this potential job since the hours are from 5-11pm, and I'd never work saturday nights.
I'd also like to get a job working some low-wage food service. I know-- you guys are thinking, "Why the hell would you do that when you are obviously possess superior intellect and qualifications?" Well, the fact is, I want one job where I can make 8-10 bucks an hour and use that to pay bills... and another job where I have the opportunity to make cash every time I work (tips). If I limit money made from the hourly job to JUST needs, and tip money for wants (booze and women) then I will have successfully managed my income priorities.
If anyone is wondering how things are going with Awesome, then let's just say she has been indefinitely downgraded back to being called "JR". The main reason for this is that 1. On New Year's Eve, she invited me over to crash after I was hanging out with my friends, and when I got there (friends dropped me off) she left me out to dry. It was roughly 30 degrees outside, and I had no choice but to walk back to the party, about a mile away. It was a brisk walk, at least. I could have called some other friends, but really, on NYE, who's going to risk that? I didn't want to put that burden on anyone I knew.
The other thing is that last night, I spent the evening with JR, and I asked her if she wanted to go see a movie and get some coffee. She declined, preferring to just stay in and watch a video. So we did that, and then went to bed. It wasn't so bad, except she woke me up at 8am (we went to bed around 1:30am) and wanted to get coffee right then. So I get up and stumble into my clothes. Being the warm morning person I am---NOT---- I was sure to express my gratitude by chugging a Negra Modelo from her fridge when she wasn't looking. Yum yum. Perks you right up, baby.
So as I'm walking out the door with her, she stops before coming out and says, "I think I'll meet you there."
"Uh... okay. Do you have to be somewhere later?"
"No, I just want to take my car." but not with you in it
Since it was at least 10 degrees outside, I sat in my car as it warmed up. I wondered why she wouldn't want to go together-- and right as the snotdrop coming out of my nose froze solid, I realized it was probably for the same reason she didn't want to go out last night, either. So to test it, I decided to just go home and hang out for a bit, shower, change, etc. If she called me up asking where I was, then she really did want to hang out. If not, she'd be too embarrassed to call in front of everyone she knows at the coffee shop, since she also works there, therefore proving my realization after all.
whateh eff....
Anyway, I ended up going over about 45 minutes later and she was there, reading some magazine. Not even a glance. Fine. You want to keep it chill when I marathon your ass the previous evening, but if this is fear of PDA, then that's a little much. So I ignored her right back. Did a xword, drank some coffee, had a smoke, and left. She hasn't called to ask where I am, so as far as I know, I'm off the hook.
As I drove to my mom's place to raid her fridge, I noticed I had a missed call from DC at about 12:30 AM last night. I ignored it, and proceeded with my day. Stay away from the Devil Woman, I thought.
Then DC called again-- very uncharacteristic of her, considering she has HGADD, which stands for Hot Girl Attention Deficit Disorder. In other words, she's batty. Anyway, I answered, and she asked me to call her later when I go out. We'll see about that.
So that's an update of my exploits, but I want to finish up with a few resolutions.
And they will be finished tomorrow. So... tune in.
The job hunt continues, but I have several leads. It's really just a matter of getting off my fat ass and making things happen. Ideally, I would work for the place Alex was talking about temporarily, cleaning offices. I like this potential job since the hours are from 5-11pm, and I'd never work saturday nights.
I'd also like to get a job working some low-wage food service. I know-- you guys are thinking, "Why the hell would you do that when you are obviously possess superior intellect and qualifications?" Well, the fact is, I want one job where I can make 8-10 bucks an hour and use that to pay bills... and another job where I have the opportunity to make cash every time I work (tips). If I limit money made from the hourly job to JUST needs, and tip money for wants (booze and women) then I will have successfully managed my income priorities.
If anyone is wondering how things are going with Awesome, then let's just say she has been indefinitely downgraded back to being called "JR". The main reason for this is that 1. On New Year's Eve, she invited me over to crash after I was hanging out with my friends, and when I got there (friends dropped me off) she left me out to dry. It was roughly 30 degrees outside, and I had no choice but to walk back to the party, about a mile away. It was a brisk walk, at least. I could have called some other friends, but really, on NYE, who's going to risk that? I didn't want to put that burden on anyone I knew.
The other thing is that last night, I spent the evening with JR, and I asked her if she wanted to go see a movie and get some coffee. She declined, preferring to just stay in and watch a video. So we did that, and then went to bed. It wasn't so bad, except she woke me up at 8am (we went to bed around 1:30am) and wanted to get coffee right then. So I get up and stumble into my clothes. Being the warm morning person I am---NOT---- I was sure to express my gratitude by chugging a Negra Modelo from her fridge when she wasn't looking. Yum yum. Perks you right up, baby.
So as I'm walking out the door with her, she stops before coming out and says, "I think I'll meet you there."
"Uh... okay. Do you have to be somewhere later?"
"No, I just want to take my car." but not with you in it
Since it was at least 10 degrees outside, I sat in my car as it warmed up. I wondered why she wouldn't want to go together-- and right as the snotdrop coming out of my nose froze solid, I realized it was probably for the same reason she didn't want to go out last night, either. So to test it, I decided to just go home and hang out for a bit, shower, change, etc. If she called me up asking where I was, then she really did want to hang out. If not, she'd be too embarrassed to call in front of everyone she knows at the coffee shop, since she also works there, therefore proving my realization after all.
whateh eff....
Anyway, I ended up going over about 45 minutes later and she was there, reading some magazine. Not even a glance. Fine. You want to keep it chill when I marathon your ass the previous evening, but if this is fear of PDA, then that's a little much. So I ignored her right back. Did a xword, drank some coffee, had a smoke, and left. She hasn't called to ask where I am, so as far as I know, I'm off the hook.
As I drove to my mom's place to raid her fridge, I noticed I had a missed call from DC at about 12:30 AM last night. I ignored it, and proceeded with my day. Stay away from the Devil Woman, I thought.
Then DC called again-- very uncharacteristic of her, considering she has HGADD, which stands for Hot Girl Attention Deficit Disorder. In other words, she's batty. Anyway, I answered, and she asked me to call her later when I go out. We'll see about that.
So that's an update of my exploits, but I want to finish up with a few resolutions.
And they will be finished tomorrow. So... tune in.
Friday, December 21, 2007
Good Timing
Part 1.
Perspective: I'm sitting on my chair listening to Johnny Cash's "I Walk The Line". This song goes further for me than I ever would have expected when I first listened to it. As I sit in my kinda-shabby apartment, watching Sister's cats body slam each other, I think of the last couple of nights. A girl heretofore to be known as JB hit on me. Hard Core. I realized this ridiculous circumstance mainly because JB (a figment in my life) decided to tell me that she was up for grabs, and all I had to do was call her and she was there for the taking.. The problem? I'm not a manwhore. The other problem? How could I meaningfully be pursuing DC if I took the easy out and got laid with JB?
My dilemma is simple. There's a girl I could have had in a heartbeat if I so chose, meanwhile, a girl that treats me like shit that I've been chasing since June.
What a fucking minute. I have DC blowing me off every chance she gets, meanwhile, there's another chick saying, "Here. I'm yours. Come and get it." People who know me really well know that I hate the absence of challenge. I have mixed feelings when a super-drunk girl hits on me, even if she knows me well. Obviously, there's the initial "Hell yea!" at being wanted in the first place, especially for something like an easy sexcapade. But the thing that kept me from going for it was only PARTLY about DC. It was more about me thinking, this cannot be the product of months and months of going out to the bars and being "Me". So I stop. I think about it. I listen to myself. Here's what myself was saying:
JB made me realize two things with her drunken attempt to sack me. First, she made me realize that with my current behavior, IE, drinking and being a bar rat, only someone who knew me well enough to know that I would probably turn them dow-- and only if that person was drunk as fuck would possibly make me an offer like that.
Yea, that's not depressing at all. Secondly, JB made me realize that the first thing that came to mind as she offered all these things was the thought of someone who had been treating me like CRAP finding out about me taking up her offer, and losing my chances completely.
Wow. Can anyone say PATHETIC?
So in one fell swoop, I decided to walk the line. Goodbye, JB. Goodbye, DC. I don't need you any less than you need me, and that's a promise.
Part 2.
Perspective: I'm sitting on my couch in my crappy apartment listening to Matchbox 20. The song is "Unwell". It's a good song for feeling like no one understands the craziness you're going through, or feeling inside. Lately, I've been taking odd jobs working as the UnBouncer (unofficial) for several places. Taking out my aggressions on people who've been deemed unbarworthy, and I get to escort them out the door. It's been a good outlet. I get to feel like the big man, and I don't have to explain my meanness to anyone. If I see them again and they call me out-- hey-- I was just doing my job (at the time).
Just as I decided that DC was out for good, I went to the coffee shop today and wondered how JR was doing. I texted her and asked if she'd like to grab a cup with me. She called me back and said she was in the middle of cleaning her apartment, but if I wanted to drop by with some coffee, that'd be good.
Side Note: I dated JR for two months last year, starting in November 06 and ending in early January 07. Our breakup was quiet for me, but noisy for her. Having said that, I've regretted walking away ever since, and I still think about our time together as a couple, even if there wasn't really a name for it.
I decided to grab a paper and stick it into my bag before heading over with coffee. When I arrived, I pulled out the paper and located the crossword puzzles, which she and I spent a very quiet 30 minutes solving. Suddenly she realized we needed to go to Hobby Lobby to grab more Christmas gift stuff, so we went there. I drove. The evening was slowly evolving into a date. Things were going well. There were flirtations, reminiscences of past dates, trips, and good times, and so on. She made whole wheat angel hair pasta with home-made pesto sauce. I gotta tell ya, it was really good. I don't know if I was just REALLY freaking hungry, or if I was just happy to be in her company again, but that felt like the best home-cooked meal I've had since T-day. Schnazzas! yow.
After the meal, I asked her if she wanted to go see the Christmas lights at the square. She looked at me very suspiciously, (which I confirmed with a sneaky grin) and reluctantly (maybe just hesitantly) agreed. I kept thinking to myself if I stop smiling, I'm going to frown for the rest of the night, because I'm so damn sure that my plans are going to get shot to hell. My plan? Go for the walk with the lights, let the romance set in, then lay it out there. Then ask if she has plans for NYE, and if not, ask her out.
Part 3.
Perspective: I'm sitting in my couch, listening to The Who's "Won't Get Fooled Again". I've got a big, stupid grin on my face. JR already has a date for NYE, but she allowed a kiss... or two... or more than a few. She lamented on how confused this all made her-- which to me is a great sign. Confusion is good. Confusion isn't "No."
Now, just so you guys know, I really do like JR. As I said before, I "Laid it all out there". That, in effect, is me saying that since we broke up, that I have never forgotten her, and that my feelings have remained unchanged. I tried (up until recently) to distract myself, but I've been unsuccessful because no other girl is like JR. She will just blurt random observations out. She is a conversationalist, and even better, she's fucking brilliant. She's beautiful to me. She appears innocent, but she's got the heart of a sage. She's a lover of life, to the point where ridiculous events are more valuable to her than others simply because she sees the value of telling the story of it later.
As the evening ended, she left acting amused and bemused alike, and me feeling wishful and confident altogether.
I promise, tomorrow, I'll be much funnier.
Perspective: I'm sitting on my chair listening to Johnny Cash's "I Walk The Line". This song goes further for me than I ever would have expected when I first listened to it. As I sit in my kinda-shabby apartment, watching Sister's cats body slam each other, I think of the last couple of nights. A girl heretofore to be known as JB hit on me. Hard Core. I realized this ridiculous circumstance mainly because JB (a figment in my life) decided to tell me that she was up for grabs, and all I had to do was call her and she was there for the taking.. The problem? I'm not a manwhore. The other problem? How could I meaningfully be pursuing DC if I took the easy out and got laid with JB?
My dilemma is simple. There's a girl I could have had in a heartbeat if I so chose, meanwhile, a girl that treats me like shit that I've been chasing since June.
What a fucking minute. I have DC blowing me off every chance she gets, meanwhile, there's another chick saying, "Here. I'm yours. Come and get it." People who know me really well know that I hate the absence of challenge. I have mixed feelings when a super-drunk girl hits on me, even if she knows me well. Obviously, there's the initial "Hell yea!" at being wanted in the first place, especially for something like an easy sexcapade. But the thing that kept me from going for it was only PARTLY about DC. It was more about me thinking, this cannot be the product of months and months of going out to the bars and being "Me". So I stop. I think about it. I listen to myself. Here's what myself was saying:
JB made me realize two things with her drunken attempt to sack me. First, she made me realize that with my current behavior, IE, drinking and being a bar rat, only someone who knew me well enough to know that I would probably turn them dow-- and only if that person was drunk as fuck would possibly make me an offer like that.
Yea, that's not depressing at all. Secondly, JB made me realize that the first thing that came to mind as she offered all these things was the thought of someone who had been treating me like CRAP finding out about me taking up her offer, and losing my chances completely.
Wow. Can anyone say PATHETIC?
So in one fell swoop, I decided to walk the line. Goodbye, JB. Goodbye, DC. I don't need you any less than you need me, and that's a promise.
Part 2.
Perspective: I'm sitting on my couch in my crappy apartment listening to Matchbox 20. The song is "Unwell". It's a good song for feeling like no one understands the craziness you're going through, or feeling inside. Lately, I've been taking odd jobs working as the UnBouncer (unofficial) for several places. Taking out my aggressions on people who've been deemed unbarworthy, and I get to escort them out the door. It's been a good outlet. I get to feel like the big man, and I don't have to explain my meanness to anyone. If I see them again and they call me out-- hey-- I was just doing my job (at the time).
Just as I decided that DC was out for good, I went to the coffee shop today and wondered how JR was doing. I texted her and asked if she'd like to grab a cup with me. She called me back and said she was in the middle of cleaning her apartment, but if I wanted to drop by with some coffee, that'd be good.
Side Note: I dated JR for two months last year, starting in November 06 and ending in early January 07. Our breakup was quiet for me, but noisy for her. Having said that, I've regretted walking away ever since, and I still think about our time together as a couple, even if there wasn't really a name for it.
I decided to grab a paper and stick it into my bag before heading over with coffee. When I arrived, I pulled out the paper and located the crossword puzzles, which she and I spent a very quiet 30 minutes solving. Suddenly she realized we needed to go to Hobby Lobby to grab more Christmas gift stuff, so we went there. I drove. The evening was slowly evolving into a date. Things were going well. There were flirtations, reminiscences of past dates, trips, and good times, and so on. She made whole wheat angel hair pasta with home-made pesto sauce. I gotta tell ya, it was really good. I don't know if I was just REALLY freaking hungry, or if I was just happy to be in her company again, but that felt like the best home-cooked meal I've had since T-day. Schnazzas! yow.
After the meal, I asked her if she wanted to go see the Christmas lights at the square. She looked at me very suspiciously, (which I confirmed with a sneaky grin) and reluctantly (maybe just hesitantly) agreed. I kept thinking to myself if I stop smiling, I'm going to frown for the rest of the night, because I'm so damn sure that my plans are going to get shot to hell. My plan? Go for the walk with the lights, let the romance set in, then lay it out there. Then ask if she has plans for NYE, and if not, ask her out.
Part 3.
Perspective: I'm sitting in my couch, listening to The Who's "Won't Get Fooled Again". I've got a big, stupid grin on my face. JR already has a date for NYE, but she allowed a kiss... or two... or more than a few. She lamented on how confused this all made her-- which to me is a great sign. Confusion is good. Confusion isn't "No."
Now, just so you guys know, I really do like JR. As I said before, I "Laid it all out there". That, in effect, is me saying that since we broke up, that I have never forgotten her, and that my feelings have remained unchanged. I tried (up until recently) to distract myself, but I've been unsuccessful because no other girl is like JR. She will just blurt random observations out. She is a conversationalist, and even better, she's fucking brilliant. She's beautiful to me. She appears innocent, but she's got the heart of a sage. She's a lover of life, to the point where ridiculous events are more valuable to her than others simply because she sees the value of telling the story of it later.
As the evening ended, she left acting amused and bemused alike, and me feeling wishful and confident altogether.
I promise, tomorrow, I'll be much funnier.
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